Australia, Right?
Not really, no…
I hadn’t really thought much about what was on the memory card in my camera until earlier and I’ve been quite happily wandering the streets of Melbournes suburbs using a borrowed camera, seeing as mine is taking a holiday to Japan without me, and it was only when I went to take some of these new images off of the card that I realised I had plenty of shots from my Thanksgiving trip to Iowa back at the end of last November… and seeing how the Premier Baked Bean Brand flickr pages are supposed to be a dumping ground for things that get shot I thought I’d just post a whole bunch there. No riding, some things that people could ride though, no beans either and still plenty of things to eat… Just in case you don’t find yourself looking over at the flickr pages maybe now’s the time to take a look before it gets left idle again for the next few months…
Bringing the fight…
There are so many things that are new, to me, it’s just a whole world of excitement… going out to buy toothpaste is more of an adventure than taking Indiana Jones on a holiday where you accidentally get mixed up in a race against time with a group of Nazis in an effort to get your towel on the lounger by the pool first there are so many choices and colours that are new and exciting… and flavours… it’s not just minty fresh…
You got to check the competition out; you can’t assume that the brand that was Premier in one country is going to be the Premier brand in all countries… and what the hell do you find out? That maybe there is more competition than you ever faced before… it was a given that the usual brands would be in attendance, no need to mention them, but it’s when you see that some brands have realised that competing bean-for-bean with Premier isn’t going to get them any where, that they need something to give them an edge… and what an edge to get… it would appear that Watties have come up with the Swiss Army Bean, the bean that offers the solution to all problems… and if it gets backing from MacGyver…
Don’t believe the hype…
It may of been quiet from the North of the Equator in the recent weeks, as I sit here cooking in heat that I thought only existed in ovens to roast chickens, I hear repeated stories of the UK coming to a standstill as the country freezes, so I can’t say I blame them… but let’s just clear this shit up… Joe may be hungry but he hasn’t branched out on his own… He is still very much involved, as much as ever, he’s just busy fighting his way through the snow-chained traffic
It’s something different at least..
Two minutes pedal from the Albert Park F1 race track and no more than ten minutes pedal from the Central Business District is this… I haven’t seen a beach with sand in years… and then you move to the big city, well, a big city, and there you go, not only does it offer all sorts of modern lifestyle conveniences but it’s got beaches too…
Idle threats
What exactly is achieved by parents idle threats? Has any one issuing these threats ever actually thought about what they’re saying and what they’re going to do if the child being threatened calls them on it?
Christmas, in the build up to a single calender day, delivers more stress than the Royal Mail can in packages in the preceding 364, and as part of that comes the blackmail… You get to see it when you get older… I was being good why? So that Father Christmas would come and leave me all I want?
Why aren’t the parents bringing out the threats of Father Christmas in July? Come the beginning of the six weeks of Summer Holidays why not lay it on the line; Father Christmas is watching you little rat bastard, so, behave or you’ll be disappointed come December . That makes a little more sense. A little more sense than “If you don’t start behaving I’m going to turn this train round and we’re going home”. How did she think she was going to do that? Southern have enough trouble putting a service that runs and the last thing they need is stressed mothers turning their trains around and I have to say I wouldn’t of been that impressed either seeing as it was my outbound journey, she probably didn’t even think of the ticketing implications, what would it of done to my return? Would the conductor of had to clip it seeing as I was heading back to where I came from? Could I claim a refund seeing as I hadn’t been able to make my destination? And how about the kid? Wide-eyed in fear he sat back and said no more; I can’t say I wasn’t happy about it, had it of been me I’d of straight up gagged him, but a part of me was after hearing three words… ‘Go on then’… He clearly had it in him, he hadn’t paused for breath in twenty minutes, but unfortunately he fell for it. Said nothing. Shit one.
That was just the most extreme threat, a variation on the idea of ’shut up or we’re going home’ that you can hear as you wander through the pedestrianised shopping areas where you can see in the eyes of the mothers the combination of fear of being beaten to what’s left on the shelves mixes with the fear of what’s to be done, I’ve heard recently, and it does make you wonder why Christmas doesn’t get left to the men… Think of the genius of Christmas dinner. No more school playground conversations of “What did you have for dinner? Turkey? Yeah… us to….” You’d instead have more excitably swapped conversations of pizzas topped with Cranberrys, to ‘keep it festive’, Duck inside a Goose inside the Dog, ‘Jamie said in his advert it was easy, and the kids ate their veg, how often do you hear that?‘ all manner of excitement. No eating huge feasts in the middle of the day, you’d get what you got when you got it. Without the stress. Then you’ve got the Russian roulette of the opening of presents; gone would be “The List” and the idea that you’d be getting a selection, if not all, of what’s on it and it would be replaced by the excitement that comes with getting something that you may of actually been after… imagine being able to say to your mates that while they were left with presents they weren’t old enough to legally be in possession of, that they hadn’t even realised existed let alone asked for, that you got something you were after, not a little unlike the kid that was desperate for his Red Ryder bb gun who had to suffer through a Christmas Day that was destined for disappointment until his Dad stepped in… Christmases like that would become the thing of legend; passed down from one generation to the next. Stories of pocket knives disguised as books, whiskey bottles disguised as bikes, the wrapping would become a part of Christmas like never before… Bikes in boxes? Pah.. how about boxes of Lego made to look like a rocking horse…
And gone would be the idle threats. No more kids being threatened as they’re dragged kicking and screaming into an experience they’d rather not be apart of. You’d have deserted streets, shopping centres would barely notice the difference in trading until the 23 December as the kids are told ‘It’s going to be busy in town, why don’t we go to the beach and toss pebbles… the park and kick a ball around… the woods for a walk and see if we can’t hunt out some bears…’
And how does they link to Beans? Well they were the only thing in the house that weren’t labeled Christmas…
It’s Christmas…. God bless everyone….
It’s Christmas so check it…
yeah it is…
It’s been a while. Life got in the way. Yeah…
Fuck YEAH…
The internet reached Iowa… so that means that I get to do this shit too… and at least one of them does the recommended daily allowance… and is properly bitter at my interrupting the two hour daily regime.. did i mention the rails? No aluminum in sight… American Steel..
Scientific Saturdays
As the main PremierBakedBeanBrand blog poster has jetted off for two weeks in the United States to make connections and escape this awful weather I thought it interesting that more than 60 percent of all adults in the United States do not engage in the recommended amount of physical activity. This lack of regular physical exercise can lead to illness and chronic diseases later in life. Regular, brisk walking is one of the simplest and safest forms of physical exercise. A regular walking program can help control weight, condition the heart and lungs, strengthen bones, and help you take the first step to a healthier future.
But if you’re like me and tend to walk seventeen and a half hours a week at least, then 87 percent of that time is spent looking or dreaming about what your going to ride when the weekend finally roll’s around only to find out that the weather is going to ruin any idea’s that came about in those nine hundred, thirteen and a half minutes of day dreaming.
Which more than likely will lead me to the pub and alcohol, and we all know long-term excessive use of alcohol causes illnesses such as liver damage, stomach cancer and heart disease. So to sum up I am looking forward to a sunny day in the future.
Later than some, before most of the rest
We stuck up a page on Flickr… gave out the password to a couple of extra people, and you’d not believe it even with twice as many people able to post the good shit up there it ain’t happening. That’s the way of it right? You think it’s a good idea, the enthusiasm is there, everyone is raring to get out in between the downpours and anything that is worthy, and all the great unworthy, can get slapped up there for everyone, and I mean anyone with the internet and the desire to see what’s going on with beans, can check it out… Ride UK pays £70 per 1000 words; so far we’re at a shade over £7 with this post… still the idea is that instead of clogging my hard-drive space with all the unused photos we just dump all of them on Flickr… do your own editing…
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